Friday, February 6, 2009

Can't sleep

the day is freezing here..
my hands and legs are cold...
i started to cough again...
i am suffering...
since the day i back from kl till today
my cough never recover...
dunno wats wrong with me?
later i gonna fly to kuching and back tml...
sounds a bit crazy..haha..
my fren gonna fly to kl this morning...
dunno when is our next meet?
cos my fren will go other place for working soon...
while on the way we back last nite,
my fren kept in silent mode...
but, i heard my fren was crying softly..
i really quite pain-hearted when saw it...
but nth i can do for u..
hope u will be fine soon...
fren, remember always take k of urself...
may God bless you always...


mine mine
3.15am
6 feb 09

Thursday, February 5, 2009

A Blue Day

my mind is blue now..
my mood is blue now also..
my heart is blue too...
my brain is blue blue blue....
my world is blue again...
i dun like blue anymore....T.T

所謂的曾經,就是幸福

i am sitting here in front of my this troublesome laptop again early in the morning..
dunno why i seems like to get used to blog in the morning time ...
maybe my brain and mind just only can be more clear and fresh now.....lol
as usual, i like to click here and there in facebook, friendster and checked my mails..
i accidentally read one of the mails in my inbox there...
i was touched by this story and i would like to share with u guys
but i think some of u might read this before......
anyway, just read it~

"所謂的曾經,就是幸福 "


中午,我站在學校大門口當交通導護,幫助一年級的小朋友放學。
卓新勇的母親,悄手悄腳提著一個便當在校門口。> 被我一喊,她露出不好意思的表情。
「老師啊!...」
「哎呀!我不是跟妳講了嗎?學校不喜歡家長替孩子送便當。
如果每個媽媽都像妳這樣,學校大門就擠滿了人,那樣,我們怎麼放學呢?」
「我知道!我知道!」哼!知道了還送,簡直是明知故犯。
「妳不會讓他自己帶便當嗎!」
「我知道!我知道!」這些話,不曉得說了幾次。
每次一到中午,送便當的家長和放學的一年級小朋友,常常相撞在一起,造成相當的困擾。
卓新勇是一位沈默寡言,乖巧內向的孩子。
有次上課,他竟然打瞌睡,我很訝異,把他叫起來。
「怎麼了?」他一臉迷惘站起來,不回答。
第二天上課,也是這樣,我實在受不了,狠狠地把他叫過來。
「你到底怎麼了?」
我已經氣得半死,口氣已經控制不住。
突然,他垂頭淌下淚水。我暗自一驚。
「說呀!到底為什麼上課要打瞌睡呢?」
我媽媽住院了!昨天一直在醫院陪她。」
我一聽愣住了,頓時,心中的怒氣消失了,代之而起的是無限慚愧,「她為什麼住院呢?」
「是肺癌!」我一聽,心都涼到腳底。
心中想到身體贏弱的卓新勇。
如果,不幸那天來臨,他將如何繼續往後漫長的歲月呢?
想到這兒,不禁鼻酸。吃飯時,妻子在餵兒子吃飯,
我不禁想起,以前卓新勇的母親偷偷摸摸替他送便當。
第二天下班後,我騎著機車到醫院探望他母親。
幾個禮拜沒見,卓新勇的母親瘦得不成人形,蒼白的臉,光禿的頭,簡直不敢相信就是她。
她看到我,顯得很驚訝,努力想站起來,但是,一咳嗽,整個人歪了一邊。
「不要站起來!不要站起來!」
「老師!謝﹍﹍謝謝你!」她吃力喊著,眼眶消出淚水。
在醫院的走廊,卓新勇的父親對我說:「只剩下兩個月了!嗚!我﹍真的不知要怎麼辦?」他老淚縱橫。
回到學校,報告校長。
「他爸爸已經六十多歲了,現在母親又將離開人間,是不是我們可以發動全校募款。不管多少,都可以幫助他。」校長爽快答應。
經過幾天募款活動,我們總算募到五萬二千一百二十元。
把錢送到醫院時,卓新勇的母親已經在昏迷中。
「我們準備今天送他回家!」卓新勇的父親,臉形憔悴得發白。我一聽,心頭抽搐一陣。
「老師!能不能幫個忙?」
「請說!我能夠做到的,我一定答應。」
「他前幾天,一直拉著卓新勇的手,喊著:媽媽不能再替你送便當了!我想,請老師再讓她送最後一次便當,只有送便當時,他才真正感受到一位為人母親的榮耀。」聽到這兒,我百感交集地點點頭。
中午,一輛救護車呼拉拉開到學校大門口。
卓親勇的父親和一名醫護人員,推著擔架上的人。
我淚水盈眶,站在旁邊,伴當交通導護老師。
「到了!到了!」卓新勇的父親買了一個便當,躺在擔架上的卓新勇的母親,伸出瘦細蒼白的手提著便當,在旁邊人員推送下,慢慢靠近大門口的鐵門。
在鐵門的另一邊,卓新勇伸出右手,接過母親的便當。
「媽!」卓新勇嚎啕大哭。
這時,我清楚見到她母親瘦削的臉頰,抽搐了一下,彷彿想說話,但是,又說不出來。
「媽!我不要!我不要妳走!」卓新勇呼天搶地叫著。
我的淚水,再也控制不住,嘩嘩而落。我暗恨自己,以前是多麼殘忍!
隔天,卓新勇的母親就去世了。
卓新勇的母親出殯後。
一天, 卓新勇的父親來到我辦公室,遞給我一包牛皮紙。
老師!這是你和學生們幫助我的錢,我認為還有更多的學生,需要這筆錢,所以,還給你們。謝謝你熱心幫忙。」說完,錢一放,就掉頭離去。
這筆錢彷彿生熱似的,直燙著我心坎。
我天天找卓新勇聊天話家常。深怕他經不起喪母的打擊。
「老師!你放心!我很好!你不要一直替我擔心!」
卓新勇對我說「我很早就知道,我母親就要死了,我也不是不想聽你話,叫媽媽不要送便當。因為,一天當中,只有中午,我才能吃到我媽媽煮的飯。」
我心頭一凜,「為什麼呢?」
她很虛弱,家裡都是爸爸在煮飯。只有中午爸爸不在,她才能偷偷背著爸爸煮飯。是她堅持要送便當的。」說完,卓新勇淌出淚水。


while i was reading this story, endless tears were dropping out from my eyes..
suddenly, i felt shame of myself..
bcos sometimes i really not satisfy with my life that my family give me now..
so indirectly i will showed my temper and complaint in front of them...
i shouldnt be like tat cos i knew wat i owned now are all come from God..
i should be grateful all the time...
yes...i still need to learn more from that...
i love my mum although sometimes she really made me mad of her nerdy actions and style...
really dunno how to discribe abt her now...
she is one of funny and weird mum that i ever met...
but i know she cares me lots than what i expected...
i love my dad too cos he still like to pamper me so much now
although he let me down once in the time before...
thanks mummy and daddy...
i hope they will always stay in health and peace...
thanks god in everythings that i met and experienced from past till now...
of cos i expected more will happen in my future..
i am looking forward on that from now..
^^

minemine
5 feb 09
11.31am

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

UNTITLED

last night, i was in blue blue blue mood...
today, my mood changed again but dunno changed to what colour...
now, i got a mood to post sth in my blog...
but, i dunno wat i gonna to share with u..
yes, i admit that i am always a contradictive person..
so, i like others to help me when do a decision making..
cos, i like to think much than more....

blogging, things that i never think to involve in before...
but now, seems like i will sign in everyday automatically...
i like to read other blogs bcos i can get to know more about them..
regardless anyone that i know or dunno...
maybe becos of this, i started to get in touch with blogging....
yea, now i am one of the bloggers also...
but, i am a low-key blogger
as less ppl r knowing my this blogger address..
i never make it known to the public before...
sometimes, i lazy to write, reasons are:
-i dunno what i want to write like now..
-i lazy to type chinese words with those complicated pinyin...
as its take time but i will do so if i have sufficient time and in mood...
-i prefer to use english more but i dun have sense of language and grammatical..
but, i dun care much anymore cos i am who i am...^^
blogger is the place that i can share all my things and feelings..
no matter in wat circumstances...
as i like as i wish as i want..
even jus a single word or nth %&#@ .......
somemore i think it will help to improve my languages also...
yeah~~fantastic!!! LOL~

now still within the cny period..
but i seems like no in cny mood ...
cos everyone beside me already back to normal life again..
someone back to kk, someone back to kl,
and others dunno where they r going..
i am still in sibu with holiday mood..
i am really enjoying a long long holiday since i finished my exams on dec 08...
its time to prepare my heart to receive my results which will release soon..
its quite scary and i nearly heart attack at the beginning....
but, i already rely everything on God...
so no worries now...
He will guide my way to walk along in every journeys..
yea yea~~~V.V

this coming sunday i will return to kl...
i gonna to leave my this pinky room with queen size bed...
and need to stay back to my share room with single size bed...
aiks...really beh song..haha...
but no choices, i force to do so cos i got 2 interviews next week..
nervous, panic, excited, happy, worries...
i think i will face full of complicated feelings at that moment..
but,i now no feel at all X_X..wakaka..
dunno is normal or abnormal or over nervous till feel nth...
i also dunno...hehe..

hmm..its time i go for breakfast + lunch...
tata everyone.......
god bless u all......
^^


minemine
4 feb 09
10.59am

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

A warming short message from someone in somewhere

To my forever love, xxxxx:

I want make my declaration to u..
i love u...i want marriage w u..
i want take care of u forever no matter u poor, rich, pretty, ugly, sick, healthy, quiet, talkative,tall, short, big, small, fat, thin.
Crying, smiling, moody, delighting, helpful, selfish, loyal, dishonest, innocent, impurities..
U r d best gift fr God to me, sweetheart.


i read this message from someone in somewhere..
its really touched and meaningful although its jus a simple and short message..
i am sure that person who received this message will have a same feeling as me..
yes, u r right...we r all the best gift from God...thanks God..
amen...


minemine
6.48am 3 feb 2009

Monday, February 2, 2009

给天父的一段心情故事

凌晨三点二十四分了。。
我睡不着。。
也许下午睡太多了??
还是心中有想不通的事呢??
我也不知道。。
觉得很多事等着我去完成呢。。
但我的心开始懒散了。。
怎么办?

今年我要开始做工了。。
有些期待,也有些害怕。。
害怕太辛苦了,但是我相信我一定行的吧。。
因为我不想让我身边的人认为我除了只懂花钱打扮外,
我也要让他们知道我也是可以赚钱。。
他们不认识我,所以他们对我有偏见。。
起初,我很难过。。
后来,我学习忍受和谅解。。
谢谢天父。。
只有天父爸爸认识我,懂我,了解我。。
所以我不要在乎别人对我的异光。。

有时,我真的很烦恼。。
我曾想过,我宁可做一个外观普通中的普通,
也不想做一个普通中的特出。
因为,我觉得我会惹人讨厌。。
别人会不喜欢我。。
所以,有时我宁愿选择低调。。
但这样又常常被人群隔离,被误以为不友善。
当我选择主动,又引起高调,被误以为爱出风头,爱显。。
总之,有一大堆的人事要等待我去处理和面对。。
谢谢天父,你不断的指引我,开解我。。
因为,只有你最了解我。。

钱,对我来说,很重要。。
因为我需要它来做很多事。。
花钱,我爱消费来打扮自己。。
但是,我会适量的花。。
我没有拥有任何一张信用卡,
所以我花的钱是我妈妈平时给我的生活费。。
不多不少,够用也够存。。
我讨厌卡债,因为它害了很多人。。
也不属于我的东西,我不敢用。。
我不借,不偷,不抢,不骗别人的钱,
所以我花自己的钱没有错吧。。
但是我总是让别人觉得我是很会花钱的坏女孩。。
所以又惹人不喜欢。。
感谢天父爸爸,他叫我再学习不要计较他人的眼光。。
所以,我不再难过了。。

花,我喜欢,
因为它很美。。
花心,我不喜欢。。
因为我是重感情的人。
但是,有人告诉我,别人说我很花心。。
又一次,我难过了。。
我的心是怎样,只有我懂。。
是花,还是不花,不认识我的人无权定论。。
但是,人言可怕。。
无事都变有事,有事都变无事。。
我讨厌人家冤枉我。。
感谢天父爸爸,
再一次,他要我不要讨厌别人,反而要爱讨厌的人。
是的,我顺服了。。
因为,我知道是花还是不,只有天父懂。。
谢谢天父。。

我没有亲哥哥和亲姐姐。。
从小,我很想要有姐姐和哥哥,
因为我想得到更多他们的爱,
总觉得他们可以保护我。。
如果有姐姐的话,她就可以教我穿衣打扮,
我就不用那么努力去从多方面学习,
也可以穿姐姐的衣服,
和姐姐做很多事。。
一起分享开心和难过。。
但是,我没有姐姐。。
我有两个唉呀姐姐,
可惜,我从来没和她们一起做过这些事。。T_T

“加油吧,女儿。。没关系,没事的。。
我会一直看顾保守你,就算全世界的人不理你,还有我”天父爸爸说。
“是的,谢谢天父爸爸。”敏敏说。

有时,为了要我身边的人每一天都开心,
我常常顾虑很多事。
有人告诉我,其实我必要顾虑那么多,
因为,我顾虑不来反而让自己难受,
何必呢?
我知道我自己能力有限。。
但是,我希望我能在我的能力范围内做到最好给大家,
我没有想要有任何的回报,
只是想让大家开心,
因为,我喜欢大家开心。
看到大家开心,我也开心。
可是,我常常做不好。
没能使他们开心到。。
但是,我希望每次的失败让我有下一次的更好。。
谢谢天父,您让我在每一次跌到都扶我一把。。
给我信心,因为我知道,
所有的信心都是从天父那里而来的。。

我看似很复杂,
但其实很简单。。

简单到我有一碗粥和鸡蛋都可以吃了。。

简单到我只要有我的宝贝枕头,我都可以睡得很熟了。。

简单到我累了,就可以什么都不想的去睡觉了。。

就好像现在。。我困了。。

所以我要关灯睡觉咯。。。

晚安还是早安呢?随便啦。。

晚安咯,我亲爱的天父爸爸。。

谢谢你,陪我聊天。。

真的好爱你,天父。。




你的宝贝女儿,
敏敏儿




Sunday, February 1, 2009

same feeling again...

2.34 am 2 feb 09

heavenly papa,
i really run out of idea for this time,
i felt sad when someone told me sad too...
i dunno how to console someone...
papa, pls heal someone's broken heart with full of sadnesses..
i dun wish these happen beside me...
pls stop it and go away from me...
papa, listen my voices and hear my prayers
pls protect my heart tightly...
show me my right way...
i need u, papa...

mine mine

the day is freezing here..
my hands and legs are cold...
i started to cough again...
i am suffering...
since the day i back from kl till today
my cough never recover...
dunno wats wrong with me?
later i gonna fly to kuching and back tml...
sounds a bit crazy..haha..
my fren gonna fly to kl this morning...
dunno when is our next meet?
cos my fren will go other place for working soon...
while on the way we back last nite,
my fren kept in silent mode...
but, i heard my fren was crying softly..
i really quite pain-hearted when saw it...
but nth i can do for u..
hope u will be fine soon...
fren, remember always take k of urself...
may God bless you always...


mine mine
3.15am
6 feb 09
my mind is blue now..
my mood is blue now also..
my heart is blue too...
my brain is blue blue blue....
my world is blue again...
i dun like blue anymore....T.T
i am sitting here in front of my this troublesome laptop again early in the morning..
dunno why i seems like to get used to blog in the morning time ...
maybe my brain and mind just only can be more clear and fresh now.....lol
as usual, i like to click here and there in facebook, friendster and checked my mails..
i accidentally read one of the mails in my inbox there...
i was touched by this story and i would like to share with u guys
but i think some of u might read this before......
anyway, just read it~

"所謂的曾經,就是幸福 "


中午,我站在學校大門口當交通導護,幫助一年級的小朋友放學。
卓新勇的母親,悄手悄腳提著一個便當在校門口。> 被我一喊,她露出不好意思的表情。
「老師啊!...」
「哎呀!我不是跟妳講了嗎?學校不喜歡家長替孩子送便當。
如果每個媽媽都像妳這樣,學校大門就擠滿了人,那樣,我們怎麼放學呢?」
「我知道!我知道!」哼!知道了還送,簡直是明知故犯。
「妳不會讓他自己帶便當嗎!」
「我知道!我知道!」這些話,不曉得說了幾次。
每次一到中午,送便當的家長和放學的一年級小朋友,常常相撞在一起,造成相當的困擾。
卓新勇是一位沈默寡言,乖巧內向的孩子。
有次上課,他竟然打瞌睡,我很訝異,把他叫起來。
「怎麼了?」他一臉迷惘站起來,不回答。
第二天上課,也是這樣,我實在受不了,狠狠地把他叫過來。
「你到底怎麼了?」
我已經氣得半死,口氣已經控制不住。
突然,他垂頭淌下淚水。我暗自一驚。
「說呀!到底為什麼上課要打瞌睡呢?」
我媽媽住院了!昨天一直在醫院陪她。」
我一聽愣住了,頓時,心中的怒氣消失了,代之而起的是無限慚愧,「她為什麼住院呢?」
「是肺癌!」我一聽,心都涼到腳底。
心中想到身體贏弱的卓新勇。
如果,不幸那天來臨,他將如何繼續往後漫長的歲月呢?
想到這兒,不禁鼻酸。吃飯時,妻子在餵兒子吃飯,
我不禁想起,以前卓新勇的母親偷偷摸摸替他送便當。
第二天下班後,我騎著機車到醫院探望他母親。
幾個禮拜沒見,卓新勇的母親瘦得不成人形,蒼白的臉,光禿的頭,簡直不敢相信就是她。
她看到我,顯得很驚訝,努力想站起來,但是,一咳嗽,整個人歪了一邊。
「不要站起來!不要站起來!」
「老師!謝﹍﹍謝謝你!」她吃力喊著,眼眶消出淚水。
在醫院的走廊,卓新勇的父親對我說:「只剩下兩個月了!嗚!我﹍真的不知要怎麼辦?」他老淚縱橫。
回到學校,報告校長。
「他爸爸已經六十多歲了,現在母親又將離開人間,是不是我們可以發動全校募款。不管多少,都可以幫助他。」校長爽快答應。
經過幾天募款活動,我們總算募到五萬二千一百二十元。
把錢送到醫院時,卓新勇的母親已經在昏迷中。
「我們準備今天送他回家!」卓新勇的父親,臉形憔悴得發白。我一聽,心頭抽搐一陣。
「老師!能不能幫個忙?」
「請說!我能夠做到的,我一定答應。」
「他前幾天,一直拉著卓新勇的手,喊著:媽媽不能再替你送便當了!我想,請老師再讓她送最後一次便當,只有送便當時,他才真正感受到一位為人母親的榮耀。」聽到這兒,我百感交集地點點頭。
中午,一輛救護車呼拉拉開到學校大門口。
卓親勇的父親和一名醫護人員,推著擔架上的人。
我淚水盈眶,站在旁邊,伴當交通導護老師。
「到了!到了!」卓新勇的父親買了一個便當,躺在擔架上的卓新勇的母親,伸出瘦細蒼白的手提著便當,在旁邊人員推送下,慢慢靠近大門口的鐵門。
在鐵門的另一邊,卓新勇伸出右手,接過母親的便當。
「媽!」卓新勇嚎啕大哭。
這時,我清楚見到她母親瘦削的臉頰,抽搐了一下,彷彿想說話,但是,又說不出來。
「媽!我不要!我不要妳走!」卓新勇呼天搶地叫著。
我的淚水,再也控制不住,嘩嘩而落。我暗恨自己,以前是多麼殘忍!
隔天,卓新勇的母親就去世了。
卓新勇的母親出殯後。
一天, 卓新勇的父親來到我辦公室,遞給我一包牛皮紙。
老師!這是你和學生們幫助我的錢,我認為還有更多的學生,需要這筆錢,所以,還給你們。謝謝你熱心幫忙。」說完,錢一放,就掉頭離去。
這筆錢彷彿生熱似的,直燙著我心坎。
我天天找卓新勇聊天話家常。深怕他經不起喪母的打擊。
「老師!你放心!我很好!你不要一直替我擔心!」
卓新勇對我說「我很早就知道,我母親就要死了,我也不是不想聽你話,叫媽媽不要送便當。因為,一天當中,只有中午,我才能吃到我媽媽煮的飯。」
我心頭一凜,「為什麼呢?」
她很虛弱,家裡都是爸爸在煮飯。只有中午爸爸不在,她才能偷偷背著爸爸煮飯。是她堅持要送便當的。」說完,卓新勇淌出淚水。


while i was reading this story, endless tears were dropping out from my eyes..
suddenly, i felt shame of myself..
bcos sometimes i really not satisfy with my life that my family give me now..
so indirectly i will showed my temper and complaint in front of them...
i shouldnt be like tat cos i knew wat i owned now are all come from God..
i should be grateful all the time...
yes...i still need to learn more from that...
i love my mum although sometimes she really made me mad of her nerdy actions and style...
really dunno how to discribe abt her now...
she is one of funny and weird mum that i ever met...
but i know she cares me lots than what i expected...
i love my dad too cos he still like to pamper me so much now
although he let me down once in the time before...
thanks mummy and daddy...
i hope they will always stay in health and peace...
thanks god in everythings that i met and experienced from past till now...
of cos i expected more will happen in my future..
i am looking forward on that from now..
^^

minemine
5 feb 09
11.31am
last night, i was in blue blue blue mood...
today, my mood changed again but dunno changed to what colour...
now, i got a mood to post sth in my blog...
but, i dunno wat i gonna to share with u..
yes, i admit that i am always a contradictive person..
so, i like others to help me when do a decision making..
cos, i like to think much than more....

blogging, things that i never think to involve in before...
but now, seems like i will sign in everyday automatically...
i like to read other blogs bcos i can get to know more about them..
regardless anyone that i know or dunno...
maybe becos of this, i started to get in touch with blogging....
yea, now i am one of the bloggers also...
but, i am a low-key blogger
as less ppl r knowing my this blogger address..
i never make it known to the public before...
sometimes, i lazy to write, reasons are:
-i dunno what i want to write like now..
-i lazy to type chinese words with those complicated pinyin...
as its take time but i will do so if i have sufficient time and in mood...
-i prefer to use english more but i dun have sense of language and grammatical..
but, i dun care much anymore cos i am who i am...^^
blogger is the place that i can share all my things and feelings..
no matter in wat circumstances...
as i like as i wish as i want..
even jus a single word or nth %&#@ .......
somemore i think it will help to improve my languages also...
yeah~~fantastic!!! LOL~

now still within the cny period..
but i seems like no in cny mood ...
cos everyone beside me already back to normal life again..
someone back to kk, someone back to kl,
and others dunno where they r going..
i am still in sibu with holiday mood..
i am really enjoying a long long holiday since i finished my exams on dec 08...
its time to prepare my heart to receive my results which will release soon..
its quite scary and i nearly heart attack at the beginning....
but, i already rely everything on God...
so no worries now...
He will guide my way to walk along in every journeys..
yea yea~~~V.V

this coming sunday i will return to kl...
i gonna to leave my this pinky room with queen size bed...
and need to stay back to my share room with single size bed...
aiks...really beh song..haha...
but no choices, i force to do so cos i got 2 interviews next week..
nervous, panic, excited, happy, worries...
i think i will face full of complicated feelings at that moment..
but,i now no feel at all X_X..wakaka..
dunno is normal or abnormal or over nervous till feel nth...
i also dunno...hehe..

hmm..its time i go for breakfast + lunch...
tata everyone.......
god bless u all......
^^


minemine
4 feb 09
10.59am
To my forever love, xxxxx:

I want make my declaration to u..
i love u...i want marriage w u..
i want take care of u forever no matter u poor, rich, pretty, ugly, sick, healthy, quiet, talkative,tall, short, big, small, fat, thin.
Crying, smiling, moody, delighting, helpful, selfish, loyal, dishonest, innocent, impurities..
U r d best gift fr God to me, sweetheart.


i read this message from someone in somewhere..
its really touched and meaningful although its jus a simple and short message..
i am sure that person who received this message will have a same feeling as me..
yes, u r right...we r all the best gift from God...thanks God..
amen...


minemine
6.48am 3 feb 2009
凌晨三点二十四分了。。
我睡不着。。
也许下午睡太多了??
还是心中有想不通的事呢??
我也不知道。。
觉得很多事等着我去完成呢。。
但我的心开始懒散了。。
怎么办?

今年我要开始做工了。。
有些期待,也有些害怕。。
害怕太辛苦了,但是我相信我一定行的吧。。
因为我不想让我身边的人认为我除了只懂花钱打扮外,
我也要让他们知道我也是可以赚钱。。
他们不认识我,所以他们对我有偏见。。
起初,我很难过。。
后来,我学习忍受和谅解。。
谢谢天父。。
只有天父爸爸认识我,懂我,了解我。。
所以我不要在乎别人对我的异光。。

有时,我真的很烦恼。。
我曾想过,我宁可做一个外观普通中的普通,
也不想做一个普通中的特出。
因为,我觉得我会惹人讨厌。。
别人会不喜欢我。。
所以,有时我宁愿选择低调。。
但这样又常常被人群隔离,被误以为不友善。
当我选择主动,又引起高调,被误以为爱出风头,爱显。。
总之,有一大堆的人事要等待我去处理和面对。。
谢谢天父,你不断的指引我,开解我。。
因为,只有你最了解我。。

钱,对我来说,很重要。。
因为我需要它来做很多事。。
花钱,我爱消费来打扮自己。。
但是,我会适量的花。。
我没有拥有任何一张信用卡,
所以我花的钱是我妈妈平时给我的生活费。。
不多不少,够用也够存。。
我讨厌卡债,因为它害了很多人。。
也不属于我的东西,我不敢用。。
我不借,不偷,不抢,不骗别人的钱,
所以我花自己的钱没有错吧。。
但是我总是让别人觉得我是很会花钱的坏女孩。。
所以又惹人不喜欢。。
感谢天父爸爸,他叫我再学习不要计较他人的眼光。。
所以,我不再难过了。。

花,我喜欢,
因为它很美。。
花心,我不喜欢。。
因为我是重感情的人。
但是,有人告诉我,别人说我很花心。。
又一次,我难过了。。
我的心是怎样,只有我懂。。
是花,还是不花,不认识我的人无权定论。。
但是,人言可怕。。
无事都变有事,有事都变无事。。
我讨厌人家冤枉我。。
感谢天父爸爸,
再一次,他要我不要讨厌别人,反而要爱讨厌的人。
是的,我顺服了。。
因为,我知道是花还是不,只有天父懂。。
谢谢天父。。

我没有亲哥哥和亲姐姐。。
从小,我很想要有姐姐和哥哥,
因为我想得到更多他们的爱,
总觉得他们可以保护我。。
如果有姐姐的话,她就可以教我穿衣打扮,
我就不用那么努力去从多方面学习,
也可以穿姐姐的衣服,
和姐姐做很多事。。
一起分享开心和难过。。
但是,我没有姐姐。。
我有两个唉呀姐姐,
可惜,我从来没和她们一起做过这些事。。T_T

“加油吧,女儿。。没关系,没事的。。
我会一直看顾保守你,就算全世界的人不理你,还有我”天父爸爸说。
“是的,谢谢天父爸爸。”敏敏说。

有时,为了要我身边的人每一天都开心,
我常常顾虑很多事。
有人告诉我,其实我必要顾虑那么多,
因为,我顾虑不来反而让自己难受,
何必呢?
我知道我自己能力有限。。
但是,我希望我能在我的能力范围内做到最好给大家,
我没有想要有任何的回报,
只是想让大家开心,
因为,我喜欢大家开心。
看到大家开心,我也开心。
可是,我常常做不好。
没能使他们开心到。。
但是,我希望每次的失败让我有下一次的更好。。
谢谢天父,您让我在每一次跌到都扶我一把。。
给我信心,因为我知道,
所有的信心都是从天父那里而来的。。

我看似很复杂,
但其实很简单。。

简单到我有一碗粥和鸡蛋都可以吃了。。

简单到我只要有我的宝贝枕头,我都可以睡得很熟了。。

简单到我累了,就可以什么都不想的去睡觉了。。

就好像现在。。我困了。。

所以我要关灯睡觉咯。。。

晚安还是早安呢?随便啦。。

晚安咯,我亲爱的天父爸爸。。

谢谢你,陪我聊天。。

真的好爱你,天父。。




你的宝贝女儿,
敏敏儿




2.34 am 2 feb 09

heavenly papa,
i really run out of idea for this time,
i felt sad when someone told me sad too...
i dunno how to console someone...
papa, pls heal someone's broken heart with full of sadnesses..
i dun wish these happen beside me...
pls stop it and go away from me...
papa, listen my voices and hear my prayers
pls protect my heart tightly...
show me my right way...
i need u, papa...

mine mine
 
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